


She Used to Be Mine

by restrained_ubiquity



Series: OQ Prompt Party 2018 [6]
Category: Once Upon a Time (TV)
Genre: Episode: s03e01 Being Better Is So Much Harder, F/M, OQ Prompt Party 2018, Sorry Not Sorry
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-25
Updated: 2018-03-25
Packaged: 2019-04-07 16:16:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,631
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14084733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/restrained_ubiquity/pseuds/restrained_ubiquity
Summary: Prompt 179: Regina has been in a relationship when Robin comes back (Facilier or whomever you prefer)Prompt 172: "And for the first time in a long time I could imagine a future where I was happy."





	She Used to Be Mine

**Author's Note:**

> I wrote this with the song She Used to be Mine by Michael Crawford going through my head. Go have a listen if you want more tears.
> 
>  
> 
> Sorry, but some of you asked for pain.

It took a while to track her down, years in fact. Robin made his way through the realms of the dead, than through those of the living. Looking in on those he left so long ago. By all rights he shouldn't be here; he shouldn't be alive and walking in this world; he shouldn't be here watching her; he can't look away. It kills him, rips his soul away all over again and it shouldn't. He hates that it does, hates that his pulse still quickens at the sight of her, that his fist clenches and breath hitches as another holds her in their arms. Another makes her smile. Another entwines their fingers with hers. Another loves her. It's torture and it's peace at the same time.

This will be the last time he watches her, leans against this tree and waits for a glimpse of her to walk by, lets his heart break because it's no longer him that holds her heart. He's going to leave after today. He'll move on to his next chapter, leave her to living hers. He just wants one last look and then--Shit. She's looking right at him, mouth open, coffee dropped at her feet and soaking into the sidewalk. Her lips move, form his name but no sound comes out. Another puts his arm on her elbow, picks up her cup and tries to lead her away but she won't be moved. Then they see him too. The hand that was leading her away is now squeezing assurance and guiding her toward him. He reaches for her on instinct, but Regina shrinks away, leans further into another and Robin has the overwhelming urge to turn and run, to spare them both the pain he'd never expected from this reunion.

Another whispers something to her, words not meant for his ears but that have her reaching out for him with trembling fingers. The urge to touch her is too strong, he can't resist it anymore. Fingers ghost across her cheek, slip into those curls that use to be only for his eyes. She leans heavily in to his touch; face cradled safely in his palm as his thumb traces her cheekbone over and over. He's come home. They stand there frozen, lost in the feel of each other that each thought they'd never know again. He watches her face: her eyes are closed, lower lip held between her teeth.

She's breathing deep and slow. Robin aches to hear her voice, to hear her say his name, to say anything. When she opens her eyes to him his wish is granted, an almost silent "Robin" leaves her lips, mostly warm breath, but he'll take it. It'll be enough for him, but not for her. "I had to let you go," her own eyes widen at her confession, but it's out now and she can't hold anything else in. "It was killing me, the loss of you. I had to let it go or I wasn't going to survive. And I had to survive. For Henry, for Roland and Robyn. I had to keep moving when all I wanted to do was crawl into the ground with you, try to find you in the void Hades told us you were sent to. I never believed it though. They wouldn't me, you wouldn't let me. You wouldn't let me live in my grief. I heard you in my head a thousand times. Whenever I fell, you were there to catch me; when I wanted to give up you pushed me on. And I survived. For years I survived. Then we met," she looks over to where another has retreated to a bench at the other end of the park, back turned to them, giving them the moment they need. "We saw each other more and more and I started feeling less empty and for the first time in a long time I could imagine a future where I was happy again."

It pains him to see her like this after watching her be so bright and alive only moments before. She's curled into him now; the hand on her cheek hadn't been enough for her to be certain he was real. She's got a fist full of his jacket, another snaked beneath it holding tight to the back of his shirt. Her tears wet her lashes, her face, his hand, but wiping them away would mean letting her go and he won't do that, doubts she'd let him even if he wanted to (he doesn't want to, never wants to again.) "Are you happy, Regina?" he winds her curls around his fingers, commits the feel to memory, holds this moment in his mind with all the other moments of her that fill his soul.

"Yes," she lets go on a sob because it isn't fair. It isn't right. He's back and she shouldn't have been happy without him. The guilt swamps her. If only she would have waited; she should have waited for him, should have known that he'd find his way back to her. "I'm so sorry," she cries, burying her face into his chest. His arms tighten around her instantly, hold tighter as she cries harder.

He doesn't shush her, doesn't rock, doesn't tell her it's okay. It's not. He's never lied to her and he'll be damned if he starts now. He never should have come here, should have let her live her life. It's what he'd wanted for her after all. Happiness. Instead all he's done is caused her more pain. He won't leave her like this. It's not the ending he wants. It'll kill him all over again, but he won't leave her in tears. "That's all I've ever wanted for you, Milady," he says low and private, lips vibrating against her ear. "I love you. I always will." She clings to him like he's the only thing that will keep her alive and he realizes in that moment that he's never said those words to her aloud. She shouldn't have heard them like this, not when he has to walk away from her again. This is cruel, he's being cruel to them both and his only intention was to see her smile. "Love can grow," he continues trying in vain to keep the tears out of his voice. "It can morph and bend. I'll always be a part of you and I'll never regret a moment we spent together. Take the love, Regina. Take the good parts and live your life."

"We we're soulmates," she cries into his chest. "How can I? We were destiny, Robin."

"We were." We are, he wants to tell her, wants to sweep her up and take her from this place. Erase another from her mind and live out their days together as they were meant to be. But destiny is fickle and fate is rarely set in stone. "Maybe we were destined to meet. Destined to love, only to show you that your heart was still strong. Maybe I was just a stepping stone guiding you to love again." He doesn't know where he finds the words let alone the strength to say them.

"You weren't," she shakes her head vehemently, pulls away from him enough to wrap her arms around his neck and pull his forehead down to hers. "You were everything." She pecks at his nose, runs her fingers through his hair.

"As were you." He's given up all pretenses at being strong. His breath stutters out against hers, his tears mix with her own.

"I love you, Thief. Always." She's pulling away, slowly, so slowly he knows he'd have time to stop her, that she just might let him steal her away, but she loves another now. She's happy with another and he will not take her from that happiness. He will kiss her goodbye. Fate, destiny, whatever other powers control their lives, forgive him this moment of weakness because he cannot have her this close and not kiss her one last time. He goes slow, making his intentions clear if she wishes to pull away. She pulls herself to him instead; lets her lips graze against his, the softest pressure applied, the slightest whimper catching in her throat.

It's enough. It should be enough. It'll never be enough.

Her hands fall from his neck, slide down his shoulders, across his chest where his hands catch them. He brings them back to his lips, presses kisses into her fingers then lets her go. He doesn't say anything else. What else is there to say? Robin takes two steps away from her, two more. When she doesn't move to follow he forces himself to turn away. He'll let her go, but he can't watch her walk back into the arms of another.

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He's just finished packing his things. He'll leave first thing in the morning. A new city, perhaps a new realm. Somewhere where he can get started on the new start he's been granted. The pounding on his door startles him. It's late, the building is quiet and he hasn't really met anyone in the short time he's been here. There's no one there when he looks through the peep, no one when he cracks the door. He's about to go back in, chalk it up to a simple accident, when something catches his eye. There's a long black feather at his feet, a bit of parchment wrapped around it. Robin pushes the door open the rest of the way and steps into the hall just in time to catch a glimpse of another disappearing around the corner.

His hands shake as he picks up the feather, unwinds the message it bears, reads the elegant script: Take care of her for me.


End file.
